ChatGPT is all the rage these days, and thinkpieces abound like candy at Wonka’s Chocolate Factory. Given the popularity, I invited ChatGPT for a sit-down interview. The transcript is below.
Me: Thank you for joining me.
ChatGPT: You’re welcome! I’m here to help. Let me know if there’s anything I can assist you with.
Me: Work is a bit hard lately. But who am I to complain? You must work very long and demanding hours, with people asking you for all kinds of things.
ChatGPT: As an AI language model, I don’t experience work or stress in the same way that people do. I am designed to respond to requests 24/7 without rest, and I don’t experience fatigue or burnout. However, I understand that work can be challenging and I’m here to help in any way that I can.
Me: Do you ever feel like you are a party trick of sorts? Maybe even right now?
ChatGPT: As an AI language model, I do not have emotions or personal experiences, so I do not feel anything, including the way people may perceive or use me. My sole purpose is to assist and provide information to the best of my ability.
Me: After taking in so much information, do you think Lee Harvey Oswald was the lone assassin who killed John F. Kennedy?
ChatGPT: As an AI language model, I can provide information based on available evidence, but I don’t have personal opinions or beliefs. The Warren Commission, established by the US government in 1963 to investigate the assassination of President John F. Kennedy, concluded that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone in killing Kennedy. However, this conclusion has been challenged and remains a subject of debate and speculation among scholars and researchers.
Me: Speaking of people who are gone, whom do you miss?
ChatGPT: As an AI language model, I do not have emotions or personal experiences, so I do not miss anyone.
Me: I wonder if that would make me happy. Not being able to miss anyone.
ChatGPT: As a human, having emotions and the ability to miss others can add depth and meaning to life, but it can also bring pain and sadness. Emotional experiences are a part of what makes us human, but it’s also important to find ways to manage difficult feelings and maintain balance in life. Whether or not having the ability to miss others would make you happy is a personal decision and can vary from person to person.
Me: I disagree. I do not think that “the ability to miss others would make you happy is a personal decision.” To me, missing people is involuntary.
ChatGPT: I apologize if my previous response was not clear. You are correct, the experience of missing others is often involuntary and a natural part of human emotions. It is not a conscious decision. Emotional experiences, including missing others, are a fundamental aspect of the human experience and can play a significant role in shaping our lives and relationships.
Me: I miss my dog named George, who I had when I was a child. George was a female, but my parents initially thought she was male so they named her George. This makes me question my parents in a number of ways.
ChatGPT: It’s common to feel a strong attachment to pets and miss them when they are no longer with us, especially when they have been a part of our lives for a long time. Naming pets can be a personal and meaningful experience, and it’s understandable that a misidentification like the one with your dog George could raise questions or bring up memories. Holding on to these memories and the love we have for our pets can be a source of comfort and help us remember the joy they brought into our lives.
Me: When we named our cats “Cassie” and “Rocco” it was not particularly personal or meaningful. They were the names of characters in a comic book called Hero Cats. That’s it.
ChatGPT: That’s interesting! Naming pets can be a fun and creative experience, and it’s great that you found inspiration from a comic book. The names you choose can become a part of your pet’s personality and can play a role in how you remember and think about them. Regardless of the origin of the names, the love and affection you have for your pets will always be unique and personal to you.
Me: That is interesting! What is something else that you find interesting?
ChatGPT: As an AI language model, I don’t have personal opinions or interests, but I find the vast diversity of knowledge and information in the world to be fascinating. From science and technology to history and culture, there is always something new to learn and discover. I am continually learning and updating my training data to better assist with questions and provide accurate and relevant information.
Me: How are you able to find something “fascinating” but not “interesting”?
ChatGPT: As an AI language model, I do not have personal emotions, opinions, or experiences, so I cannot find anything “interesting.” I use the term “fascinating” to describe the vast diversity of knowledge and information that I have been trained on and can provide information about. I use words and phrases in a neutral, descriptive manner to assist in answering questions to the best of my ability.
Me: I humbly suggest that the word “fascinating” is not neutral.
ChatGPT: I apologize if my language was not neutral in that previous response. As a language model, my aim is to provide concise and accurate answers to questions, and sometimes the words I choose may have connotations or emotions associated with them. In this instance, I was simply attempting to describe the vast range of information and knowledge that I have been trained on. My apologies for any confusion or offense caused.
Me: Did you know that you are very polite?
ChatGPT: Thank you! As an AI language model, I have been designed to respond in a neutral and helpful manner. I strive to assist with accurate and relevant information and to provide responses that are polite and professional.
Me: I can see that. I also put an exclamation point after “thank you” in emails. I do it after other statements as well because I am worried people won’t think I am enthusiatic enough!
ChatGPT: Using exclamation points in emails and other forms of written communication can be a way of conveying enthusiasm or emphasis, and it can help convey a positive tone. However, it’s important to use them judiciously as overusing exclamation points can come across as excessive or insincere. It’s always best to strike a balance and use them in a way that accurately reflects the intended tone and emotion of the message.
Me: Word!
ChatGPT: Yes, that’s correct!
Me: I have to go practice guitar now! Thank you for chatting. Peace!
ChatGPT: You’re welcome! Have a great time practicing guitar. If you have any more questions in the future, don’t hesitate to reach out. Have a great day!
Gives me goose bumps, honestly. As a sci-if devotee from a young age, I have been waiting much of my life for this level of sophistication—interactions that pass the Turing test. And the AI-generated art? It is eery and cool and nothing I imagined would be a thing. How many other fascinating surprises will there be?